In other words, mutual consent agreements help establish and maintain consent! Think of a mutual consent agreement as an agreed-upon menu of sexual acts and how you may “bring them to the table” during the experience. Why Should You Care About Mutual Consent Agreements?Ī mutual agreement is a process by which boundaries, activities, and parties involved in a sexual encounter are mutually and openly discussed and agreed upon before engaging in play. Even if you aren’t planning on getting kinky or visiting a dungeon, you can still learn lessons on practicing consent from how BDSM/kink negotiations, or what we will call “mutual consent agreements,” are established. Communication about consent involves “negotiation” about what will and won’t occur in a “scene,” or an erotic encounter, before any play occurs and continued verbal and non-verbal communication. Because these behaviors often involve physical and/or psychological risk, consensual communication is the foundation of these practices. BDSM involves a variety of erotic practices and stands for Bondage & Discipline, Domination & Submission, Sadism & Masochism, whereas kink is non-conventional sexual practice or fantasies. A group that understands the nuances of consent and focuses on “ safe, sane, and consensual” behavior is the BDSM/Kink community. Consent is a critical component of sexual play that is dependent on honest, mutual communication and respect for boundaries, especially when it comes to risky sexual behavior.
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